Change? It’s an inside job!

Did you know that most of the beliefs we hold about ourselves and the world around us come from our early years?

From birth to about six years of age we are downloading information into our subconscious mind. This information creates the ‘programmes’ we run in our minds, our ‘scripts’.

The beliefs we form about ourselves and the world in which we live have a huge impact on us.

We form those beliefs and make those patterns of behaviour from the conclusions we draw from our experiences.

No trauma or experience is ever too small or insignificant.

What’s important is the impact it has on us and how we live our lives.

Dr Bruce Lipton states:

“For the first six years of a child’s life, it’s like a tape recorder is on. Everything it sees, smells, touches and experiences in any way, whatever it hears is being downloaded into the brain before the consciousness of the child is even made apparent”.  

So when we want to make changes to the way we live our lives, to improve our relationships and how we function day to day – we need to look within! We need to tap into our subconscious mind and reset those beliefs.

When we understand how as humans we have an energy body as well as a physical body, that the energy of who we are is as important as our physical self it can open up a whole new approach for us.

We can change our mindset, break free and be who we want to be and have what we truly desire!

So what are you searching for?

Do you wish life could be different? That you had more confidence and less fear?

Is there something you’d really love to do but a nagging voice inside your head convinces you that you wouldn’t be good enough?

When we look to make changes, it’s the inner work that brings us the lasting change, the ability to become who we really want to be.

The greatest gift we can give ourselves is to heal our limiting beliefs, to enjoy healthy, loving and  meaningful  relationships. To step into our power, let go of our fears and really live an authentic life.

A life where we are comfortable in our own skin, where we accept ourselves for who we are.

Here are a few tips for you on the journey to yourself:


1. E.F.T. and Matrix Reimprinting

My go to tool for clearing my ‘stuff’ is E.F.T. and Matrix Reimprinting. In all my years of working in the world of healing I have found that EFT (and Matrix Reimprinting which is a form of EFT) really can get to the root cause of what it is that’s causing you a problem. So be it fear and anxiety based or a feeling of not being good enough or any myriad of potential issues – give EFT a go.

It can look a bit ‘woo woo’ when you first come across it but the results it offers are well worth suspending judgement!

It’s okay to be sceptical in the first instance, I know I was! I remember thinking “Oh sure you just tap a few points and your sorted!” But when I really studied, experienced and trained in EFT I realised the power of this therapy. Just give it a try!


2. Don’t compare yourself to others.

Decide not to compare who you are with others. So often the lives of others can appear to be wonderful, but things aren’t always as they appear, so comparison is futile.

You are a unique human being, that’s what so wonderful about you. There is only one you and that’s what makes you special. Celebrate your uniqueness and don’t try to be a copy of someone else.


3. Get clear on what you want!

Use your mind to focus on what you do want. Often we are clear about what we don’t want or like but don’t always give ourselves time to get clear about where we’re going and what we want to do.

Think about it, if you were going to make a journey to a place you’d never visited before you would make a plan, check out the trains or the route by road or air. Setting intentions of what we’d like to do and who we’d like to be really helps! Worrying is like focussing all your attention on what you don’t  want

(Tip: if when you’re coming up with all those wonderful goals and desires and a little voice pops into your mind, you know, the voice that says ” yes but…..that’s for others, not for you….etc etc” you can use tapping to clear the ‘yes buts’ and other internal blocks – the ‘yes buts’ are actually really helpful as they help you see into your subconscious thought process)


4. Meditate and Visualise

Meditation and visualisation will also take advantage of your wonderful subconscious. Meditation helps us to get into the flow, to clear our minds and settle our energy. Whilst visualisation uses your imagination to make pictures in your mind of what you want.

Your subconscious mind doesn’t know the difference between what is real or not. So if you keep playing that film of how you’d like your life to be your subconscious kicks in to help support you to make it a reality! (Tapping the finger points whilst you do this makes the exercise even more powerful).

5. The first and last five minutes of your day

The thoughts and pictures we have in our mind as we go to sleep, the last five minutes of our day, are minutes we’d be wise to use to our advantage.

Be sure to be grateful for the good stuff of the day, to keep positive images and thoughts in your mind as you drift off to sleep (whilst you sleep your subconscious will be ‘marinating’ in what you’ve been focused on!

Likewise with the first five minutes of your day, have an attitude of gratitude and a focus on where you want to be. See your day in beautiful images in your mind, set your positive intentions.

Hope these tips help!

Photo on

Photo by Joel Bedford on / CC BY-ND



Does your life ‘fit’ your values?

Are your values something that you give much thought to? Are they even your values, maybe they belong to someone else whose passed them onto you?

Do you even know what your values are and do you check in with yourself to ensure your life is in alignment with your values?

This is a such a valuable topic to explore – if we are in a job, relationship or a pattern of living that doesn’t fit with our values we will feel ill at ease and as though something is missing from our lives.

So what are our values and how do we find out what matters to us?

The dictionary definition of value is : the importance or worth of something for someone or how useful or important something is.

The definition of values is : the beliefs people have, especially about what is right and wrong and what is most important in life.

So often in life we are very clear about what we don’t want and often that’s where most of our focus goes; but what if you were to get clear about what you do want?

By looking at what our core values are it can become so much easier to gain clarity on where we want to be in life.

As an example; you may have been brought up with a strong work ethic, the beliefs of those around you were that you have to work hard for what you want, that it’s necessary to make sacrifices, that security is everything and we have to work hard to get ahead.

If this were the case the following might be the reality:

  • You’re in a job that pays you well.
  • It’s secure (or at least as secure as any job can be!) and you’ve worked so hard to get to the position you currently hold.
  • You work long hours (but that’s what’s expected in the business world).
  • You’ve sacrificed time with your family and friends in the pursuit of the career you’ve worked for.
  • Sometimes your work affects your sleep and wellbeing.
  • You feel you have to stay one step ahead to stay afloat.


How to find your core values:

Make a comprehensive list of every single value that resonates with you, you can go on and on making the list as long as you like.

Then take that list and whittle it down to the 10 most important values for you – this sounds difficult but it’s worth taking the time for. When you have your 10 values, place them in order of importance to you and give them a score from 0 – 10 as to how much of that value you have in your life. So 0 would be none of that particular value in your life and 10 would be that you are totally living that value.

There is no right or wrong with our values, it’s about what’s important for you and what makes your life work. We can endeavour to be this or that but if it doesn’t fit with our core values it’s always going to feel a bit off.

If we come up with a score below 10 for any of  our top 10 values we can use tapping to discharge our emotional response to how we’re feeling about each value and really gain clarity and focus about what’s important to us and how we might change things and live the life we have always wanted to live.

Our values change throughout our life and we can re visit the values exercise as part of our personal growth.

This is such an illuminating exercise and one that is so worth doing as when we know our values and are living in alignment with them life just somehow flows. Being clear makes it so much easier to be focussed on what we want in our life (this helps us when manifesting too).

For me, freedom and love featured highly – also playfulness turned out to be more important than I thought – this is something I’m not particularly good at and scored low in the amount playfulness features in my life so I need to work on this!!

So, what makes your heart sing and what fills you with dread?

If trying to ease your life into fitting with your values more is something you’d like to explore I’d be delighted to help you.

Over to you……

This is such a huge subject but so very interesting and I would love to know how you get on with your list. Did you find it easy or challenging? Please join in the conversation by leaving a comment below


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Do you limit yourself?

Do you have an inner knowing?

That feeling deep within.

That strong desire to be who you know deep down you already are but you can’t somehow bring her out into the light and let her be seen.

It can be scary, being seen, speaking out and stepping into your power – allowing your light to shine brightly.

Maybe you believe you’re not good enough and lack the self confidence to become who you really want to be.

Can you relate?

I used to be constantly searching for my true self, trying to find my purpose and wanting to feel fulfilled.

I have studied and read so many books on self development and personal growth!

Sometimes this was because of a very real desire to read the article or book and other times it was because I felt the words on the page might somehow give me the key, the answer to what I was searching for.

Then………one bright and wonderful experience helped me realise that the answers were really within me ; yes me, that person that I never fully trusted before because I felt I was somehow lacking, not quite enough!

Now I’m not saying that I now have all the answers but I am certainly so much more comfortable with me – and more fulfilled and confident.

How so?

I found EFT.

I know this might sound at best a bit evangelical and at worse a bit ‘salesy’. But I can only speak from my heart, and because it has been so life changing for me I just want to share it with others, so that they too can let go of their limiting beliefs and start that inner journey to fulfillment.

Since finding EFT my life has changed so much, in a good way.

I always knew I wanted my work to be about empowering other women but I just wasn’t clear on how I could make that a reality . But now I am.

If letting go of limiting beliefs is something you’d like to explore I’ve included a tapping script for you (you can always change words that don’t resonate with you.) Take a peek at the tapping demos on my website, they’re free and will help as a visual reminder of ‘how to tap’.

So here goes:

Karate chop point for the set up:

“Even though I lack self confidence I love and accept myself just as I am.”

“Even though I’m afraid of creating change within myself I completely accept myself just as I am.”  

“Even though I really would like to step into my own power, I’m scared to but I love and accept myself anyway.”

Below I’ve indicated where to tap and you can repeat the ’round’ more than once if you wish.

Top of head: “I wish I felt more fulfilled, comfortable being the me I really want to be.”

Eyebrow: “I’m not confident enough to make changes in my life.”

Side of eye: “I wish I felt more comfortable in my own skin.”

Under eye: “I know I have so much to offer but I’m scared to put myself out there.”

Under nose: “I don’t know how to let go of this fear.”

Under mouth: “I don’t want to stand out in case others judge me.”

Collarbone: “I feel scared of being my true self.”

Underarm: “I don’t want to be seen.”

Top of head: “I just feel lost at the moment.”

Eyebrow: “Maybe I should just stay put.”

Side of eye: “Who am I to think I can be special?”

Under eye: “But I know there is more to me than I currently show to the world.”

Under nose: “What if I felt safe being seen?”

Under mouth: “Maybe I can move forward.”

Collarbone: “Baby steps is how to do it.”

Underarm: “I choose to start the process of change, to feel more confident and at ease with who I am.” 

I would love to know how you get on with this tapping round, it would great to have your feedback and if you know someone this might help please feel free to share it.


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