Do you ever do a life audit?

What’s important to you?

What values do you hold dear?

 

When I had a huge life changing event several years ago it felt as if my world, as I knew it, was imploding!

This event triggered an episode of severe anxiety and panic attacks (A & E, tranquillizers, E.C.G. due to the effects of anxiety on my heart) and in the moment I really thought I’d never get through it.

But now I look upon that life change as a huge gift!

As traumatic as it was at the time I have come out of it stronger and with a clearer view as to what really matters in life.

It showed me what’s important and I became stronger (that saying, “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”, has an element of truth in it!).

It forced change upon me, having to start over and rebuild – but I see now that the Universe was kind of pushing me to get back on the path I feel I was always meant to follow, but I’d got stuck on a path that didn’t really work for me, it just didn’t fit my values and that which I hold dear.

The change was uncomfortable and I certainly wish I’d had the knowledge then that I have now about EFT and Matrix Reimprinting as that would have made a huge difference.

However, I accept that my journey happened just as it was supposed to.

As I started to heal and come through this I began to see that the Universe really did have my back (although at the time it didn’t feel that way). This trauma opened up so many opportunities for me and bit by bit my new beginning really got under way. The help I needed just began unfolding. Once I felt stronger I felt able to take inspired action as each opportunity unfolded.

One of the really positive outcomes for me, was that it made me re-evaluate what’s important to me.

I’m sharing this experience as I’d love for you to be living a life you love and not just settling or getting swept up in an experience of life that doesn’t quite fit.

These days we are bombarded by images and words in the media that are trying to convince us of what we need in our lives. It’s so easy to get swept up and believe the hype.

To feel ‘less than’ if our lives don’t match the media story.

I know people who are working all the hours they can just to sustain the life style they believe will make them feel good. Following a path that was expected of them – often a path they were steered along by someone else.They miss out on time with family and friends as they’re often busy working or too tired to engage with others.

For some folks, the need to accumulate “stuff”, as a way of validating themselves, is a belief they’ve downloaded; seeing it as somehow proving they’re successful. The flash car, big house, fancy clothes, expensive restaurants and glamorous holidays all support this.

Now I’m not saying for a minute there’s anything wrong with enjoying the good things life has to offer BUT ….. just not at the expense of being comfortable with your life and who you are. It’s just when the money, the success or the acclaim becomes the most important thing it can feel hollow.

(It’s interesting, when we live a different and perhaps more simple life we don’t need so much money to support us anyway, so we can work less or smarter).

Finding a life that really fits who you feel you are deep down is liberating, joyful and oh so possible for us all. After all, we are the creators of our lives, we can be really powerful manifestors when we’re in alignment with what really makes our heart sing. We are often unconsciously creating so that’s another good reason to be clear on what you really want.

Doing a bit of an audit of your life can help put things into perspective.

There’s so much to value in life that’s available to everyone.

That random act of kindness for another person without expecting anything in return (research shows that kindness and giving is as good for the person doing the giving as it is for the recipient).

Taking time to be mindful and really be in the moment. Everyone can find time to meditate and create a calm space in their mind.

Getting out in nature, really appreciating all the wonderful things around us.

Our relationships (the good ones that is!). Making time for people. We are wired in such a way that being with people we have a really positive connection with, feeds our spirit and nurtures our soul.

So if something feels out of sync for you, I would really invite you to take stock, focus on what you would love to be doing, how you’d really love to be living your life and make those changes.

I know that can feel scary at first, but baby steps can start your new journey – sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. There are times when we just have to ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’!

Using tapping (EFT) can really help you cope with change and also with creating a new vision of how you’d like your life to be.

If this is something you’d like to explore we can always connect for a free chat and take it from there.

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Let go of the old and bring in the new!

As 2016 comes to a close, it’s important to take some time and reflect on the year that’s gone and look to the new year and what you would love to welcome into your life.

So often in our busy lives, particularly at this festive time of year, we can overlook opportunities, miss out on taking time for reflection and just keep doing what we’ve always done!

“The definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing over and over and expect different results!” ~ Albert Einstein

Now this wouldn’t be a problem if your life is just as you want it to be and you feel how you want to feel.

But if you’d like things to be different it is well worth taking time to release the energy and events of the old year and start to focus on the new year – making plans and intentions.

So you could begin by looking back over 2016 – run it like a film in your mind.

Written work

Picture all the life events you experienced – what went well – what was disappointing – how were your relationships – did it prove to be a year that fulfilled you or one that left you feeling empty. Were you doing what you wanted to do or was something holding you back?

Write down all the thoughts and feelings around what you’d like to release, to let go of. Be open and honest with yourself, no one else is going to see this (remember to tap during this process, just on the collar bone point or chin or one of the eye points as this will help if any uncomfortable feelings arise whilst you’re writing). You can write what you need to write, say what you need to say, on this piece of paper.

Written work like this can be extremely cathartic and liberating. Once your writing is complete, take your piece of paper and burn it on an open fire, a bonfire or somewhere else that’s safe. The burning process helps release what’s past and the most powerful day to do this on is new years eve.

Visualise

Another way of releasing is to do a visualisation. Sit somewhere quietly, somewhere you won’t be disturbed, close your eyes and focus on the things you’d like to release whilst tapping on your finger points. In the visualisation, picture yourself somewhere you love being either real or imaginary. Then within this scene see a large cloth on the ground and imagine all that you want to let go of being placed in the middle of the cloth. Visualise yourself bringing all the four corners together and tying securely to make a parcel that you then attach to a balloon that then floats away, up into a deep blue sky and eventually out of sight.

Intention

When you feel you’ve done your releasing bring your focus to the new year – 2017 – and think about how you’d like the year to be.

What do you want to be doing?

Who are the people you want be spending time with?

Is there something you’d like to achieve?

Old patterns of behaviour you’d like to change?

Write down your hopes and dreams, be as creative as you like, use colour, really flow with all that you’d like to have. It may be peace, more fun and joy. Doing something exciting, starting a new career – whatever it is, get it down on paper. Use a special journal if you have one and keep your writing somewhere safe. Using visualisation of a future picture of your life can help. This is a short recording to help get you started, it’s short enough to do it at least twice a day.

“A dream without a goal is simply a wish”

Remember it’s your life, your path, your purpose – you are important and so are your hopes and dreams. So give your self time, invest in this process.

If you are using a journal, go to it every day – revisit your words – plan, have fun with it! Life is such a gift and it is possible to live a life you love!

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom” ~ Elizabeth Appell

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Are you feeling jolly or jaded?

Staying sane, calm and focussed during the run up to the Christmas festivities can be really challenging can’t it?

We are bombarded by media images of perfect families and relationships along with the constant prompting to buy this or that as it will ‘make our Christmas perfect!’. It’s no wonder stress can take a hold on us.

Financial stressors can be huge too or perhaps it’s the friend or relative who always has too much to drink and causes trouble.

Perhaps this is the first lone Christmas or there’s a feeling of needing to put a brave face on your current, troubled relationship. It can be a minefield!!

The pressure is on to join in with various social events and mix with people we really aren’t that keen on. We’re often expected to spend time with our families which can trigger a whole plethora of emotions and feelings.

So whatever your situation, here are a few tips to try to help you support yourself and come out the other side!

1. Don’t forget your self care

When we’re busy it’s so easy for all our good intentions to fly out the window. Try to take some exercise daily, even if it’s just a short walk or some deep stretches. Remember your deep breathing, focussing on your breath helps you clear your mind and stay calm. Use some tapping on the stresses that show up for you. Stay hydrated. Our bodies need us to drink plenty of water especially if we’re flying any where or spending time in overheated shops. Staying hydrated helps our bodies cope with alcohol consumption too.

2. Just say “no”

It’s not compulsory to accept every invitation or answer every request for help. It’s NOT selfish to preserve your energy for the things you really want to do. Whilst the holiday season is a great time to get together with others you don’t have to feel obliged to say yes to things you’d rather not do. Be kind to yourself, try and avoid overstretching yourself, both emotionally and physically.

Let go of feeling the pressure to buy expensive gifts for others, putting yourself under financial pressure. This really is a case of ‘it’s the thought that counts’. Small gifts that have real love and thought put into them are so lovely to receive.

Choose who you spend time with, don’t be bullied into attending yet another dysfunctional family gathering; you could always create your own gathering or maybe volunteer and spend time in the company of people for whom your presence would mean so much.

Just because, in previous years, various traditions have been observed, it doesn’t mean that you can’t create a whole new way for you to spend the season.

3. Remember your support system

If you have people who you turn to for help and support throughout the year make sure you stay connected to them. If you usually Skype or see them in person be sure to exchange numbers so that you will each have someone to turn to should you need to.

4. Plan

If you’re travelling ensure you’re clear on your route and the times of public transport etc. This can help take the stress out of a journey. Ensure those you’re travelling to visit have your mobile number and know the time you were expecting to leave home and then arrive with them. Carry some cash as well as payment cards and have a healthy snack and some water in case of delays. If your blood sugar drops stress can take hold.

5. Have realistic expectations

So many of us have such high expectations as to how Christmas ‘should’ be that if anything doesn’t go according to plan it can feel like a catastrophe.

When your dealing with such an emotionally charged time of the year it’s almost a given that things won’t go according to plan and that’s okay! Try to see the humour in any hiccups, relax and know that in the bigger scheme of things, hiccups happen, plans change and it just isn’t like the ads we see on the television (thank goodness).

Relax and breathe and know that this time will pass and very shortly we will be welcoming in a new year that can be full of all sorts of wonderful opportunities, fresh starts and hope.

Having realistic expectations will help you avoid that empty, let down feeling when the celebrations have passed.

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My tiny teacher

So, who’d have thought a tiny little three year old could be such a brilliant teacher (and she’s no idea she’s teaching me anything)!

She’s just herself; free, not at all self conscious; she’s curious; she’s funny and joyous; she has no hidden agenda and is oh so full of love.

When she’s with me we have so much fun (something that hasn’t always come easily to me!) she loves music and dancing and we often shake our stuff around the kitchen, laughing and being totally in the moment!

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if she were to keep this energy about her – breezing through life, undamaged and unhindered.

Maybe we all started our lives in this way – maybe we didn’t?

How we evolve as people depends so much on:

  • our personal experiences
  • our family background
  • the words that are regularly spoken to us
  • our feeling of security or lack of it
  • how our experiences shape our view of ourselves and the world around us
  • the limiting beliefs we forge as a result of our experience

To enjoy that wonderful feeling of just being okay with who we are, not caring what others think of us – even if we haven’t been fortunate enough to experience great self esteem and self confidence as we’ve grown into adult hood – just because that hasn’t been our story thus far doesn’t mean it never can be.

Whatever stage we are in life there is always time, it really is never too late to be who you really want to be!

Being self conscious and not wanting to be seen has stopped me from having fun in the past. I just couldn’t relax and let go. I was always too busy comparing myself to others.

As for living in the moment – how can you do that when you’re always worrying about all sorts of things? Stressing about the past, fretting about the future – just existing in this uncomfortable place of existence.

But when you find a way to free yourself of the baggage that weighs you down it is so very liberating.

It takes time I know but it’s oh so worth it. I’m not sure I like the term ‘personal development’ – I think of it more in terms of stepping into who you were always meant to be – when you’re free of what’s weighing you down.

Imagine being able to really experience joy and happiness. To look in the mirror and feel really comfortable with the person looking back at you.

For example, my grand daughter has no fear of failure or judgement, she loves having a go at new things, if it doesn’t quite work out she’ll just try another way. And she’s always ready to ask for help if she gets stuck. She has no ‘downloads’ of limiting beliefs, no hang ups about how she looks and behaves.

She loves music and dancing and just does that thing that some adults refer to as ‘dancing as though no one is watching’ – but we are watching and delighting in her freedom of expression. She’s not bothered if her moves aren’t quite right – there’s no element of self consciousness – she’s just free and being in the moment.

She’s like a little sponge, so interested in everything and always wanting to learn how to do new things. It doesn’t enter her head that she may be judged or fail.

But what can you do if you have beliefs about yourself that prevent you from living the life you would choose. Maybe you subconsciously believe you don’t deserve it or maybe that you’re not good enough.

There is much we can do to support ourselves and free ourselves of limiting beliefs. Dr Bruce Lipton says we are not stuck with any aspects of ourselves that we would love to change – you can find many of his talks on YouTube . He’s a great believer in the various energy psychology disciplines of which EFT and Matrix Reimprinting (an EFT technique), are a part.

Performers like Michael Ball and Naomie Harris use EFT and athletes were seen using it at the Rio Olympics!

If you feel ready to let go of your limiting beliefs, to move forward into being who you really want to be, just drop me a line and we can have a chat about what your needs are, I’d love to hear from you!

 

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What to do when someone really gets under your skin!

So, I had this situation, when someone I love was being treated very unfairly.

My challenge came when I had to keep my cool and be objective in the face of interference from those who meant well but were just making matters worse.

I was oh so tempted to rant back, to defend my loved one as I know the truth in this situation.

It took all my strength not to and instead I took the following action ………..

Giving myself self space and a different perspective was so empowering.

Although initially that was the last thing I felt like doing, my mind was creating all these different scenarios.

I was totally overthinking things – all these ‘what ifs’ where scrambling my brain!

Then…………relief………….I let my fingers tap away these thoughts, beliefs and feelings and I gained clarity and calm.

Sometimes we forget the steps we can take to help ourselves…..

It’s curious, I have this fantastic tool in EFT and also Matrix Reimprinting but when stressed I sometimes forget to use it straight away. But this time I was so frustrated that I used EFT repeatedly to try to clear my frustration, anger, disappointment, anxiety and all the other difficult feelings that were bubbling to the surface.

And you know what, it worked!

I know logically that EFT can help us deal with so many difficult beliefs and feelings. It was just that, when in such an emotional state, I wasn’t thinking clearly – but once I started tapping I felt calmer, had more clarity around the situation and instead of the frustration I could start to see how I wouldn’t help my loved one at all being in that mindset but that by regaining my calm I could be much more objective and helpful!

Once I was much calmer and clearer I decided to sleep on what action (if any) I might take. The old adage that things look different in the morning is actually true, getting a good nights sleep and reflecting is the way to go!

I couldn’t have taken this route without clearing all my frustrations though.

Talking it through………

I also took counsel with a very good, trusted friend. You know the kind that listens and gives advice that’s not emotionally charged. It’s so helpful being listened to in a non judgemental way and being given a real feeling of support and acceptance.

Write a letter you don’t send……….

This person had really pushed all my buttons, so I did some written work and wrote a letter I never intend to send.

It’s so cathartic allowing the words to just tumble forth, no editing, no being selective – just getting it all out – having the rant I would like to have had with them.

But this way I could vent my spleen without recourse or repercussions. (If you burn the letter this adds to the clearing process!)

Working in the energy field………

I’d been writing this piece over several days and during this time I did some work in the Matrix (aka our energy field). When you work in this way you can have conversations and resolutions with the people involved, you can go backwards and forwards in time, whatever you need to do!

Well, this work is extraordinary……..following the work I did in the Matrix (Matrix Reimprinting is an EFT technique) much change happened for the best.

The energy of those involved settled and some great conversations were had and healing started to become possible.

It’s great to have these tools at my disposal and all of them can be available to anyone 🙂

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Does your life ‘fit’ your values?

Are your values something that you give much thought to? Are they even your values, maybe they belong to someone else whose passed them onto you?

Do you even know what your values are and do you check in with yourself to ensure your life is in alignment with your values?

This is a such a valuable topic to explore – if we are in a job, relationship or a pattern of living that doesn’t fit with our values we will feel ill at ease and as though something is missing from our lives.

So what are our values and how do we find out what matters to us?

The dictionary definition of value is : the importance or worth of something for someone or how useful or important something is.

The definition of values is : the beliefs people have, especially about what is right and wrong and what is most important in life.

So often in life we are very clear about what we don’t want and often that’s where most of our focus goes; but what if you were to get clear about what you do want?

By looking at what our core values are it can become so much easier to gain clarity on where we want to be in life.

As an example; you may have been brought up with a strong work ethic, the beliefs of those around you were that you have to work hard for what you want, that it’s necessary to make sacrifices, that security is everything and we have to work hard to get ahead.

If this were the case the following might be the reality:

  • You’re in a job that pays you well.
  • It’s secure (or at least as secure as any job can be!) and you’ve worked so hard to get to the position you currently hold.
  • You work long hours (but that’s what’s expected in the business world).
  • You’ve sacrificed time with your family and friends in the pursuit of the career you’ve worked for.
  • Sometimes your work affects your sleep and wellbeing.
  • You feel you have to stay one step ahead to stay afloat.

BUT IF YOUR CORE VALUES ARE FREEDOM AND FULLFILLMENT YOU CAN SEE HOW YOUR VALUES WOULD BE CLASHING WITH YOUR REALITY.

How to find your core values:

Make a comprehensive list of every single value that resonates with you, you can go on and on making the list as long as you like.

Then take that list and whittle it down to the 10 most important values for you – this sounds difficult but it’s worth taking the time for. When you have your 10 values, place them in order of importance to you and give them a score from 0 – 10 as to how much of that value you have in your life. So 0 would be none of that particular value in your life and 10 would be that you are totally living that value.

There is no right or wrong with our values, it’s about what’s important for you and what makes your life work. We can endeavour to be this or that but if it doesn’t fit with our core values it’s always going to feel a bit off.

If we come up with a score below 10 for any of  our top 10 values we can use tapping to discharge our emotional response to how we’re feeling about each value and really gain clarity and focus about what’s important to us and how we might change things and live the life we have always wanted to live.

Our values change throughout our life and we can re visit the values exercise as part of our personal growth.

This is such an illuminating exercise and one that is so worth doing as when we know our values and are living in alignment with them life just somehow flows. Being clear makes it so much easier to be focussed on what we want in our life (this helps us when manifesting too).

For me, freedom and love featured highly – also playfulness turned out to be more important than I thought – this is something I’m not particularly good at and scored low in the amount playfulness features in my life so I need to work on this!!

So, what makes your heart sing and what fills you with dread?

If trying to ease your life into fitting with your values more is something you’d like to explore I’d be delighted to help you.

Over to you……

This is such a huge subject but so very interesting and I would love to know how you get on with your list. Did you find it easy or challenging? Please join in the conversation by leaving a comment below

 

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Can you feel it?

Can you feel it?

Can you feel the energy gently rising?

That inner stirring that heralds Spring – that emergence of the new.

An opportunity for us to begin anew – to make gentle changes emotionally and physically – go with the flow of Spring and you’ll find it supports you in making changes and moving forward.

Traditionally we are encouraged to make changes in our lives in January as the year begins. In reality, Springtime is by far the best time for a ‘life audit’ – by harnessing the natural energy of Spring we will find it easier to embrace a new beginning.

• Do you have feelings of being stuck or unable to move forward?

• Do you get irritated regularly?

• Are you frequently feeling hung over or toxic?

• Do you suffer with sore, tired eyes or eye strain?

In Chinese Medicine each season has a specific message for us – there are specific emotions and physical traits for the season of Spring if we try to tune into the natural flow of the seasons our energy and health will benefit.

Detox is not just for the physical body, it is also a great time to clear our emotional clutter and release unwanted and limiting beliefs. Remember, when we clear what no longer serves us it leaves space for the new to come into our life.

The feeling of new energy calls us to invigorate our bodies and homes – then we match the new, fresh energy of the season.

This time of year is perfect for planning ahead, making new beginnings and letting go of that which no longer serves us. Spring really is about regeneration!  Setting goals and laying the foundations for a happier, healthier you.

If we feel we are emotionally and physically balanced we will enjoy good energy – it’s when there is a disruption in our bodies energy system that problems can arise.

So, if you’re feeling that you need to do a bit of a personal Spring clean – here are some tips:

  1. Spring is the perfect time to detox and clean up your act! Indulge in light, fresh spring vegetables, lots of endive, green leaves, lemons, carrots, radish, beetroot, leeks, green beans, parsley, watercress. Eat more brown (wholegrain) rice (it’s brilliant for ‘mopping up’ toxins), hummus, pumpkin and sunflower seeds. Home made juices and soups and plenty of fresh fruit. Spring vegetables should be raw or lightly cooked, stir frying is great for this. Reduce or eliminate dairy products, wheat and sugar.
  2. In Chinese Medicine Spring is attached to the Wood element – this focuses on the liver and gall bladder. To help support these organs, on waking take half the juice of a freshly squeezed lemon, top it up with a bit of warm water and take 2 teaspoons of olive oil with alternate sips of lemon juice. I will often do this for several days and use a drinking straw for the lemon juice in order to protect my teeth enamel.
  3. Dry skin brushing is brilliant to support any kind of cleanse. You’ll need a brush specific for this purpose – you brush the skin whilst it’s dry, before your bath or shower and use long, fairly vigorous (so the skin ‘pinks’ up) sweeping stokes, always in the direction of the heart. This is really great for getting the lymph fluid moving around the body which helps clear toxins.
  4. Exercise for the Spring – the following types of exercise are
    ideal for Springtime:
    any kind of gentle stretch – I thoroughly recommend Putkisto it’s the best stretch method I’ve come across, the flexibility and release it gives the body is wonderful. Body pump or a weight training regime, Yoga or T’ai Chi, squash or tennis.
  5. Last but by no means least – have an emotional clear out, let go of beliefs that no longer serve you, if you feel you have something you need to clear try EFT – as a holistic therapist for some 24 years, I haven’t come across anything as effective for clearing our emotional baggage than EFT – it’s effects are so powerful. My website has plenty of free content, demo videos, tapping point illustrations and scripts – all designed to help you get started.

 

I hope these various tips will be useful for you, you can do even more but these are a good start! If you have any questions, please either leave a comment below or feel free to email me.

I’d love to hear how you get on if you implement any of these or perhaps you already follow a similar regime in Spring. It’s so good to share how we find these processes and it’s good to support one another.

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Why can it be so hard to follow your heart?

You’ve been feeling as though life is passing you by. There’s this thing that you’d really like to do, this change that you’d really like to make but it’s just not happening for you! You’ve reached ‘stalemate’ – you don’t want to stay stuck where you are but you just don’t know how to move forwards. Can you relate?

So many things get in the way of us achieving what we dream of.

Fear.

Anxiety.

Overwhelm.

Not feeling good enough.

In my life I’ve found that for me to live the life I wanted, I had to let go of the baggage I was carrying (I am still a work in progress and always will be, that’s how we grow). Letting go of this stuff meant facing some difficult feelings and exploring my limiting beliefs.

There are many reasons why it’s so hard to follow our hearts and live the life we dream of – these may be some of our obstacles:

Programming: As we move through life we are encouraged to do many things; things that our care givers and peers see as the normal route in life. We’re told to get a proper job, to work hard, that life isn’t easy – you have to push and struggle. The truth is all of the above are beliefs that were probably also handed down to those who expressed them.

Beliefs: The programmes we ‘download’ lead to our beliefs. When we are exposed to the beliefs of others we absorb them as though they are true. For example we may be brought up to believe that life is supposed to be a struggle, that money doesn’t grow on trees, we have to work and toil for anything worth having. We may have absorbed the belief that if we follow our heart we are sure to find difficulty, lack, no security and so on. But these beliefs are just other peoples stuff, programming that has been passed down through time.

Expectations: Following your heart and building your dreams isn’t always the easiest option. It can be challenging to release the blocks that are holding us back.

Fear: No matter how much we may want to follow our heart and be who we really want to be it can be very scary. Not following the path that we are expected to follow and not conforming can bring up lots of feelings. Fear can be completely paralysing and keep us stuck where we are. When we look at the fear, when we get in touch with the feelings around our fear we can start ‘playing’ the story in our mind as to why we should be afraid – fear can make it hard to move forward.

The day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was greater than the risk it took to blossom” – Anais Nin

Here are 5 tips to make it a bit easier:

1. Baby steps. As the saying goes , every journey begins with just one step! Don’t try to make lots of changes all at once it can be too overwhelming.

2. Don’t over analyse. Learn to trust your inner voice, listen to your heart, to your intuition. Sometimes we humans have a tendency to overthink things. Take time each day for yourself, maybe meditate, or walk in nature, listen to music; anything that gets you out of your head and into your heart. Time to just be helps us see things more clearly. 

3. Be kind to yourself. Self acceptance is something many of us have to work on. We may have that feeling of not being good enough, of lacking in some way – but this is simply down to the experiences we’ve had and beliefs we’ve formed – both of which can be healed. 

4. Feel the fear! I know this might sound counter productive, but by feeling our feelings and tapping through them we can release those fears.

5. Stop using words like should and ought! Language like this can keep us stuck in our old patterns. Ask yourself, ‘who says you should and you ought to?’ Don’t compare yourselves with others, we can often look at someone else and imagine they have it all, that their life seems so sorted. But this is often far from the truth. Be you, follow your heart. Relax into who you are, see the Golden Buddha within.

This life that we’re living wasn’t ever meant to be a struggle, it is such a beautiful gift, one that we can all unwrap and live with joy, love and fulfilment.

So be kind to yourself, learn to love yourself and enjoy growing into who you feel you are truly meant to be. If you feel you’d like some help with this, I’m always here to support you along the way.

 

I’d love to hear your thoughts – are there certain times of the year when change feels easier?  Do you have a fear or a block that stands in your way?

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Is this you?

I used to believe that I was stuck with the anxiety that had almost overwhelmed me. I would observe other people and imagine how their lives were, picturing them having everything so sorted. They obviously had good jobs, wonderful relationships; were completely content with who they were; with loads of self confidence and self worth – in fact it seemed like they had it all and certainly had nothing to fear!

Then there were others I’d see who I’d imagine had decided to keep life simple; not challenging themselves and taking (as I saw it) a calmer less complicated route by just being happy with what they had! Somehow settling – not putting themselves forward (putting myself forward felt impossible to me because of how I was feeling). My head would be all over the place – it was so uncomfortable and I just felt like I was staggering from day to day. Can you relate?

I would overthink things, analysing, worrying, comparing, agitating and generally feeling less than everyone else. I felt, deep down that I had more to offer the world but I just didn’t know how I was ever going to find the strength and self belief to reach that place.

Do I still believe that? No……not any longer. I now see that this was all part of the effect the anxiety was having on me and I can also see how the years of downloading negative beliefs about myself and the world around me had affected how I had been living my life!

Oh, and by the way, there is nothing wrong with living a simple and quiet life so long as that is your choice and you are not living that way because you are frightened of stepping out of the shadows, not wanting to be seen.

I also used to think that you had to be a nervous kind of person in the first place for anxiety to become an issue – this isn’t necessarily true, anxiety can affect any one of us, at any time. It can create some very real physical symptoms too!

So if this sounds anything like an experience you may have had or be experiencing currently then here are a few tips for you:

  • Be kind to yourself, don’t push yourself beyond what feels comfortable.
  • If anxiety rises, practise deep breathing, I know it might sound too simplistic, but breathing slowly in for the count of six and out for the count of six whilst just focussing on the breath, is calming and if you really focus on the breath it helps to calm the mind.
  • Be sure you eat a wholesome and nourishing diet. Avoid sugar which agitates the bodily systems and causes spikes in our blood sugar. Supplements are often a good way to ensure we get our needs met. For instance magnesium, which is a vital mineral for calming and relaxing our bodies and healthy cellular function is very depleted from our crops due to over farming of the land. Also, our liver requires B vitamins for it’s functioning and when we are stressed we use lots of B vitamins so need additional supplies.
  • Use EFT as a self help tool. I use EFT as a daily tool for all sorts of things and when it’s something I really need to get to the bottom of I use a professional practitioner. I have seen first hand how EFT can create such positive changes in peoples lives.
  • Try to spend time outside in nature.
  • Spend time with people who lift you up and support you.
  • Have a relaxing body treatment to calm, soothe and balance.

Whatever approach you choose to deal with anxiety, I want you to know that it is so  very possible to heal and that in fact life can become all you want it to be. If you feel I might be able to help you find a way to heal just drop me a line and we can take it from there.

 

 

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So, have you ever made one?

Vision baord - writingI’m talking Vision Boards here, they are such fun to create and really help you to focus on how you want your life to be. Lots of people use them as a way of really ‘seeing’ what they want. People such as Oprah and Jim Carey have used them to create the life they want. Vision Boards help and inspire them to achieve their aims in life. They ‘see’ their dreams and future plans via their vision board.

So what is a vision board?

They are so easy to make, you can use a vision board for pretty much anything. You could use one to focus on just one area of your life, say your career maybe, or make one to encompass your whole life as you’d like it to be. The only limit is your imagination!

Vision boards are a perfect way to begin the New Year – instead of the traditional New Year resolutions, which often seem to be about giving things up, and generally beating yourself up about not being as you ‘ought’ to be……you could try the vision board option, it’s a positive slant on change, bringing in positive visions, focusing on our hopes and dreams. It’s a much kinder approach, but still very effective.

These days, having previously started the New Year with a resolution to give something up (and in years past, usually failing miserably!) I now much prefer to focus on bringing in all the lovely things I’d like to make up my life.

 

Here are 7 tips for creating a vision board that will work for you

Essentially a vision board will feature images and some words, anything really that sums up what it is you are aiming for.

  1. For your board you could use a fabric crisis cross board, magnetic board or pin board or just a large piece of card to get creative on – all these examples are good because it will be easy, when the object of your desires has come to fruition to replace it with something new?
  2. You can use images from magazines; photos you have taken; brochures – all of these could provide the content for your board. Make them colourful and uplifting to see – if something you have chosen for your board seems ‘too good to be true you can use  EFT to release those feelings of doubt or unworthiness
  3. Text that sums up what you’re aiming for. Cut out or write words that resonate with your vision. For example, perhaps you’d like to have more freedom, you could find this word in a magazine and cut it out, or write the word itself on a piece of paper and find an image that represents freedom to you. Keep the words in bold text so they can be seen clearly
  4. Have your board somewhere you will see it every day, that way your subconscious mind will be regularly exposed to the images and messages on your board. I have mine in front of my desk, so I see it daily – this is really important. The mind then becomes very aware of what it is you are aiming for.
  5. Really look at your board, not just a glance but a proper focused look at your images and text. Take time to enjoy your board, really see the images and feel how it would be to be that person, have that freedom, live that life – our subconscious responds strongly to how something feels for us.
  6. Be creative, really get into the flow of what you would like to attract into your life – whatever works for you, it’s your board and you want it to be about you and your life.
  7. Don’t over think how you are going to achieve you wishes/goals – simply focus on what it is that you desire – keep ‘seeing it’ and feel what it would be like to have it.

Sometimes we unconsciously ‘block’ the things we desire from coming to us (I know I’ve done this!) Maybe we have a belief that we somehow don’t deserve it, that we’re not worthy of what we desire? Maybe we think it’s wrong to wish for things, to want a better life?Vision board blog - frame

These beliefs are downloaded into our subconscious mind as a result of an experience or something that has been said to us and they can be changed. I’ve used  EFT and Matrix Reimprinting for myself and with my clients as it really helps to get to the core of our beliefs and change them to something that really works.

So, go on have some fun and create a vision board for how you’d like 2016 to be for you!

Over to you

Do you use vision boards to help you focus on your goals and the way you would like your life to be? If so, I’d love to hear what your approach is, did it work for you? New to the idea of vision boards and fancy giving it a try? I hope this article helps you get started, above all have fun creating your board!  Your voice is the only thing missing from this post. Please do leave a comment below, I’d love to hear from you.

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